Sunday, March 27, 2011
March 25
It’s been 10 days since my surgery and I’m starting to bounce back and feel better. I’m taking it one day at a time and trying not to focus on what might lie ahead but instead think about how far I’ve come since my diagnosis. The journey has already had a few ups and downs, but I’m looking forward to a lot more ups this summer. My post op appt. with my medical oncologist and reconstructive surgeon went really well. Apparently only 15% of patients receiving chemo treatments respond as well as I did. They said that I was 100% cancer free at the time of surgery. What that means is that when they went in to remove the breast tissue, they found no live cancer cells, but only scar tissue where there once was cancer. That was a huge relief to hear just to know that all I went through with the chemo treatments turned out to be so successful. They also found scar tissue in one of my lymph nodes which means that at one time there was cancer present there so they asked me to think about going in to have all of the lymph nodes removed as a precaution. If I don’t elect to have them removed then I will need to get an ultrasound every 3 months to check the area. I’ve decided to wait and see, knowing that I will have to have a second surgery for the reconstruction anyway and we can always do it then. Right now I want to enjoy thinking about being CANCER FREE and focus my energy on healing from my surgery. I was told by a friend that I will need to change the name of my blog from karenhascancer to karendoesnothavecanceranymore….but I’m going to wait and see. I’m usually a very positive thinker, but getting cancer has a way of getting the best of you and you find you just aren't as invincible as you once thought. Anyway, I’m going to keep this blog up but might not post anything new for a few months. Remember, no news is good news. I’ll be back when I have something to report. Thanks for sticking with me.
Saturday, March 12, 2011
March 12
Sorry for the delay since my last blog. I’ve had my last chemo treatment and it’s a good feeling. I can’t tell you how thrilling it is to know that I won’t have to go through those awful side effects again. Now it’s time to focus on my upcoming surgery, or not focus on it and just get through it. The more I think about it the more anxious I get so it’s probably best to stay so busy that I don’t have a lot of idle time to dwell on it too much.
It must have been weighing heavy on me the other night when I went to bed. I woke up at 5:30am after having a bad dream. In the dream I was visiting a zoo or park here in Florida with my sister Cheryl, her husband Larry and youngest daughter Carly. We had all stopped to look at this little pond with cute Flamingo birds when Larry and Carly decided to get closer to them so they jumped over the pond to the other side. Once they were over there, Cheryl and I realized that they had just landed in the middle of a bunch of alligators. We were screaming at them to jump back over to our side and didn’t see the one alligator on our side that was coming at us! Suddenly this huge one came at me and jumped up and bit off my cancer infected breast!! It was so bizarre that even while still asleep I had a sneaky feeling that it was a dream. Although I was pretty relieved when I woke up.
I guess that was my way of telling myself that even though I’m scared of the surgery it’s better than having an alligator bite off the cancer. Or the message could have been that I’m supposed to watch out for alligators when visiting local parks and zoos with my sister. I’m going with the first one which really tells me to put my faith in my doctor that does these surgeries all the time and that I will be cancer free and healthy when it’s all said and done. Next week, March 15th is the first surgery. Wish me luck!
Sorry for the delay since my last blog. I’ve had my last chemo treatment and it’s a good feeling. I can’t tell you how thrilling it is to know that I won’t have to go through those awful side effects again. Now it’s time to focus on my upcoming surgery, or not focus on it and just get through it. The more I think about it the more anxious I get so it’s probably best to stay so busy that I don’t have a lot of idle time to dwell on it too much.
It must have been weighing heavy on me the other night when I went to bed. I woke up at 5:30am after having a bad dream. In the dream I was visiting a zoo or park here in Florida with my sister Cheryl, her husband Larry and youngest daughter Carly. We had all stopped to look at this little pond with cute Flamingo birds when Larry and Carly decided to get closer to them so they jumped over the pond to the other side. Once they were over there, Cheryl and I realized that they had just landed in the middle of a bunch of alligators. We were screaming at them to jump back over to our side and didn’t see the one alligator on our side that was coming at us! Suddenly this huge one came at me and jumped up and bit off my cancer infected breast!! It was so bizarre that even while still asleep I had a sneaky feeling that it was a dream. Although I was pretty relieved when I woke up.
I guess that was my way of telling myself that even though I’m scared of the surgery it’s better than having an alligator bite off the cancer. Or the message could have been that I’m supposed to watch out for alligators when visiting local parks and zoos with my sister. I’m going with the first one which really tells me to put my faith in my doctor that does these surgeries all the time and that I will be cancer free and healthy when it’s all said and done. Next week, March 15th is the first surgery. Wish me luck!
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
January 11...Day 141
Tom and I decided to spend New Year’s Day on Sanibel Island so we could relax and spend some quiet time together and to start 2011 focused on something other than cancer. I had never been down past Sarasota on the east side of Florida so we drove slowly to enjoy the views, stopping at an art fair in Fort Myers and purchasing a fun beach painting before driving across to the island. We had a yummy lunch overlooking the ocean and the weather was sunny and warm. After lunch we planned on taking a long walk on the beach and look for seashells which is what Sanibel is known for.
Before we left town, I noticed that I had a small Cyst in a very delicate area…upper inside thigh or lower inside butt cheek (kind of confusing how to describe) that had decided to get larger, red and slightly sore to the touch. I didn’t think anything about it except to note that I would call my Oncologist Monday morning after the holiday weekend. Unfortunately, the cyst had another plan. It grew from about the size of a pea to the size of a golf ball and was protruding during our drive down. I couldn’t walk or sit without being in a lot of pain. No long walk on the beach and our romantic weekend was slowly slipping away from us. How could this be happening????
To make a long story short, we mustered together what we could of the weekend. We managed to have a very delicious dinner at this quaint little Italian place in a brightly painted beach house. But by the time we made it back to our hotel room after dinner I was in severe pain and could only think about how I shouldn’t be so far away from my dr. I didn’t relax or sleep much that night and we drove home first thing in the morning.
By the time we made it home on Sunday, the cyst had turned black and was abscessed, I ended up in the ER for 5 hours where they had to open, drain and pack the wound. Apparently the cyst was on the verge of bursting and had I waited any longer the infection could have gotten into my bloodstream and killed me! What a way to start off the New Year!
So, I could look at it two ways. Yes, our weekend wasn’t what we planned but we did get to have somewhat of a getaway and I did get to the ER on time and the cyst didn’t burst and I’m on my way to a healed wound. I can finally sit again without pain and besides taking antibiotics the only other requirement from the dr. was to take 2-3 baths a day. I love to take baths so that’s good. And someday it’ll be a good laugh about how we tried to have a romantic weekend and I ended up with a cyst the size of a golf ball on my butt. What’s not funny about that? Also, they delayed my scheduled chemo that was supposed to happen today to next Tuesday. Again, could be upset but it allows me to be healthy and strong for my first week at work since my promotion to manager. What’s not good about that?
Before we left town, I noticed that I had a small Cyst in a very delicate area…upper inside thigh or lower inside butt cheek (kind of confusing how to describe) that had decided to get larger, red and slightly sore to the touch. I didn’t think anything about it except to note that I would call my Oncologist Monday morning after the holiday weekend. Unfortunately, the cyst had another plan. It grew from about the size of a pea to the size of a golf ball and was protruding during our drive down. I couldn’t walk or sit without being in a lot of pain. No long walk on the beach and our romantic weekend was slowly slipping away from us. How could this be happening????
To make a long story short, we mustered together what we could of the weekend. We managed to have a very delicious dinner at this quaint little Italian place in a brightly painted beach house. But by the time we made it back to our hotel room after dinner I was in severe pain and could only think about how I shouldn’t be so far away from my dr. I didn’t relax or sleep much that night and we drove home first thing in the morning.
By the time we made it home on Sunday, the cyst had turned black and was abscessed, I ended up in the ER for 5 hours where they had to open, drain and pack the wound. Apparently the cyst was on the verge of bursting and had I waited any longer the infection could have gotten into my bloodstream and killed me! What a way to start off the New Year!
So, I could look at it two ways. Yes, our weekend wasn’t what we planned but we did get to have somewhat of a getaway and I did get to the ER on time and the cyst didn’t burst and I’m on my way to a healed wound. I can finally sit again without pain and besides taking antibiotics the only other requirement from the dr. was to take 2-3 baths a day. I love to take baths so that’s good. And someday it’ll be a good laugh about how we tried to have a romantic weekend and I ended up with a cyst the size of a golf ball on my butt. What’s not funny about that? Also, they delayed my scheduled chemo that was supposed to happen today to next Tuesday. Again, could be upset but it allows me to be healthy and strong for my first week at work since my promotion to manager. What’s not good about that?
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